Category Archives: Uncategorized

A BULLET DODGED

Two fateful bullets were fired this week. 

One bullet slightly grazed Donald Trump, the traitor, the insurrectionist and the GOP’s presidential nominee. Resulting damage appears to be slight, while providing a sympathy bump in the candidate’s poll numbers and a bandage Trump can wear all week to remind us of his heroic stance as a victim of a thwarted assassination attempt.

The other bullet was more metaphorical in nature. Fired after weeks of protracted teasing and coyness by Republican candidate Trump, the bullet struck J.D. Vance, making him the GOP candidate for Vice President on the Trump ticket.  

More salient to the point of this discussion is… who was lucky enough to dodge the bullet…?

 Closer inspection of the event reveals the bullet came close to hitting—but missed, in its deadly trajectory—Doug Burgum, governor of North Dakota, multi-millionaire, Trump sycophant and runner-up to be Trump’s VP selection. Some might call Burgum unlucky to come in second to J.D. Vance but I regard him as supremely fortunate. 

As Jesus famously asked, “What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world but loses his soul?”

Yes, Doug Burgum or, more accurately, Burgum’s soul dodged a bullet when the serial liar, convicted business fraud, lifelong grifter and GOP presidential nominee set his sights on J.D. Vance.

Burgum had already seriously wounded his soul by swallowing whole his earlier comments about Trump—all pejorative and belittling—and offered when the riches of the world were not being dangled in front of his hungry eyes. Suddenly, lies not only replaced Burgum’s honest opinions and personal insights, but they were waved around like flags of honor, and held high enough for his capo de Capos to see.

By adopting the entire slate of lies and offended righteous air of Trump defenders, as have hundreds of Republican lawmakers, Burgum had already parted ways with his soul which, in the nature of souls, clings faithfully to the path of honesty and decency, but had not yet committed himself to the level of dishonesty and soul damage that accepting a vice presidency under Trump would clearly entail.

That level of dishonesty colors one’s entire life. It undermines every honest relationship, every attempt to guide one’s children by example, every attempt to prove to your spouse or business associates that you are worthy of your place in their lives. Such dishonesty trumpets itself in every word and action you take, because nothing will obscure the fact that every word and deed undertaken under fealty to Trump is unprincipled and self-serving.

Most likely, Doug Burgum was disappointed by Trump’s decision to anoint J.D. Vance. But if you could press Burgum’s soul for a reaction, all you would get, I bet, is a soulful sigh of relief. 

NEW VACCINE PROTECTS AGAINST DONALD TRUMP

Introducing VERACITY VACCINE By Paul Steven Stone Labs. THE ONLY VACCINATION proven up to 95% EFFECTIVE AGAINST DONALD TRUMP’S reckless and unceasing trampling of the truth.

Studies have shown that almost 45 percent of America’s adult population are at risk of succumbing to Donald Trump’s outright lies and empty promises. Twice yearly injections of VERACITY should prevent or totally eliminate normal MAGA reactions to Donald Trump’s deceit-layered behavior.  

VERACITY VACCINATION IS 100% EFFECTIVE AGAINST:

DONALD’S LIES:  Whether he’s claiming to have uplifted more Afro Americans than Abraham Lincoln, insisting the January 6th insurrection was a patriotic field trip or trying to sell a condo with only 1/3 the actual square footage stated on the listing, Donald Trump’s lies are virtually unstoppable. Worse still, they come at you so fast and furiously, you are quickly numbed to their audacity and obvious mendacity. Chances are, by the time you realize Trump is telling a lie, he has already buried the original lie under half a dozen new ones. 

Now, with our new VERACITY VACCINATION, Donald’s lies are no longer audible. Through the wonders of modern pharmacology, VERACITY renders its users impervious to Donald’s lies, from the largest honkers to the smallest and whitest of lies. With VERACITY your hearing will suddenly drop out from both ears at the first detection of a Donald Trump falsehood. Gone are all promises of a border wall paid for by Mexico. Never again will you have to listen to Donald’s crybaby complaints of witch hunts, political persecutions and rigged elections. 

During the periods of silence that ensue while Trump vomits up lies, falsehoods and misstatements, VERACITY VAXERS will have their choice of peaceful classical compositions, courtesy of Amazon Music, to transform Trump’s typically mendacious rants into melodious musical interludes.

VERACITY VACCINATION IS 100% EFFECTIVE AGAINST:

DONALD’S GRIFTS AND SWINDLES:  Whether it’s a cheap, repurposed naugahyde-covered bible, or gold-foiled basketball sneakers, Donald Trump always has something new and unexpected to sell you. Maybe you prefer to spend your discretionary income on Trump campaign donations. Well. that’s fine with us. Anything you want, just as long as we get all your available money.

With a VERACITY VACCINATION, you will no longer be susceptible to Donald Trump’s vulgar and tasteless sales pitches. Similar to how sounds disappear at the first whisper of a Trump lie, VERACITY shuts off both your eyesight and hearing instantly upon encountering one of Donald’s sales pitches, leaving you impregnable and unreachable as a sales prospect. Unfortunately, it also leaves you totally vulnerable to the dangers of automobile traffic and various other human activities.

For protection at such moments, VERACITY purchasers will receive a placard—absolutely free!—to hang around their necks declaring, “HELP, DONALD TRUMP LEFT ME DEAF AND BLIND!” 

That’s VERACITY from Paul Steven Stone Labs. Two shots in the arm annually and you can live your life in peace once again.

And that’s the truth!

FORGET-ME-NOTS

by Paul Steven Stone

FORGET-ME-NOTS

(a poem of remembrance)

Some critical facts to memorize

When Truth is mired ‘neath muck and lies,

While all around, cult fever runs wild

Threatening the Future like an unprotected child.

FORGET-ME-NOT, FORGET ME NOT,

Who tried to steal a second term,

Counting lies instead of votes.

And remember who did not.

Recall as well whose sordid deeds

Echoed daily in the news…

Sexual assault, slander, business fraud

All charged, tried and proved.

And remember who did not.

FORGET-ME-NOT, FORGET ME NOT,

Who lacks integrity, kindness or shame,

The morals a president is lost without.

And remember who does not.

FORGET-ME-NOT, FORGET ME NOT,

Who sent a mob to sack the capitol,

Trashing 250 years of American democracy.

And remember who did not.

Forget-Me-Not, Forget-Me-Not

Whose epic Covid malfeasance

Sent thousands to unnecessary deaths.

And remember who did not.

Forget-Me-Not, Forget-Me-Not

Don’t vote for anyone who tried to steal an election,

And remember who did not.

50 WAYS TO STEAL AN ELECTION

(With humble gratitude to the brilliance of Paul Simon)

“THE PROBLEM IS ALL INSIDE YOUR HEAD,” HE SAID TO ME.

“The answer is easy if you take it logically

“Just sing these words and pretend that you’re guilt-free

“There must be fifty ways to steal an election”

JUST ERASE THE VOTES, JACK

Don’t let blacks vote, Mac

Get Putin to help, Don

Mess up the count, Tom

Sabotage the mail, Bill

Reject the results, Phil

Question Joe’s ballots, Lee

No need to be coy, Roy

Just tear down the House, 

And claim sweet Victory.

I SAID “IT GRIEVES ME TO SEE YOU IN SUCH PAIN.

“Is there something I can do to make your smile come back again?”

He said, “Thank you very much, just let me sing my sweet refrain

“About the fifty ways to steal an election.”

JUST LIE UNTIL THEY CRY, STAN

Then accuse and deny, Man

Bring in fake electors, Gus

And Rudy’s traveling circus bus

Threaten poll workers, Dick

Menace voters thin and thick

Go before the Supremes, Lee

Where Justice is too blind to ever see, 

Just cheat till you’re home free.

And claim your Victory

HE SAID, “I WON’T LET MYSELF LOSE TO JOE AGAIN.

“It grieves Melania so to see me in such pain

“You see there’s something I can do to make Maga World smile again

“It all depends on those 50 ways to steal an election.

“Count ‘em, 50 ways to steal an election.”

JUST ERASE THE VOTES, JACK

Don’t let blacks vote, Mac

Get Putin to help, Don

Mess up the count, Tom

Sabotage the mail, Bill

Reject the results, Phil

Question Joe’s ballots, Lee

No need to be coy, Roy

Just tear down the House, 

And claim sweet Victory.

Make no mistake, if Donald Trump tried once to steal the presidency; he will do so again. Realistically, he has no incentive to play fair now, especially when a return to the Oval office could negate all federal crimes for which he stands accused. It’s fatuous to think Trump will suddenly reform his ways and realize that the country he is attempting to lead again is far more important than the fate of a single individual.

I WILL BET—EVEN GUARANTEE—THAT DONALD TRUMP AND HIS GANG HAVE ALREADY MADE PLANS TO STEAL THE 2024 ELECTION. WE MUST BE ON OUR GUARD.

HE WAS ONE OF OUR OWN

 

      He died in a far away land. On a road outside a town whose name no one back home could easily pronounce. There was no big battle reported in the news accounts, nor any strategic maneuver to which his death could be attributed. Just a short-lived attack on an army convoy moving from one place in a desolate foreign land to another.

       Perhaps there was a reason why the insurgents — which is what the army now called these faceless enemies — decided to attack his convoy rather than another. More likely, it was the opportunity that made the decision, the presence of a convoy on an unprotected road being all the logic required for the monster of war to feed on another youngster’s life. 

       If there was a reason for the attack it seemed too obvious to be worth the price of his death. For every casualty was now a strategic prize in and of itself. A minor victory in the war to convince the American TV audience that the loss of each soldier was without purpose when it happened in a war that seemed itself without purpose.

       His was a company of military police. They had no strategic mission other than to help bring order to a land that had been brutal and violent since before the sands took sovereignty over its vast, unwelcoming terrain.

       And now this young man who was a stranger to us in life becomes a brief visitor to our world through the magic of television. We see his photo, taken after he had already left the playing fields of his youth to be groomed by a military that had offered him . . . what? Adventure? Four years of college tuition? A chance to see the world? A ticket out of the small Southeastern Massachusetts town that had known and nurtured him for 18 of his 20 years? 

       False promises, all. The adventure ended far too quickly. There would never be a college career. The world, it turned out, had nothing to show that was worth the price he would be asked to pay. And the last thing he would be given was a return ticket to this small Southeastern Massachusetts town. Coming home in a box draped with an American flag and accompanied by a military escort.

       He was a star on his high school football team, or so we are told by his former coach. And though we never saw him play nor cheered his efforts we somehow feel we know him better because he had excelled in this quintessential American sport. Neighbors tell us what a good boy he had been and what a tragic loss this is for anyone who knew him.

       The TV news reporters, faced with a family not ready to share its grief, repeatedly show us the exterior of the simple ranch style home in which the vanquished soldier had lived out his boyhood. A large American flag is draped next to the front door, originally placed there most likely to remind the world of all the sons and daughters off fighting in distant lands. Now, ironically, it serves as a mute testament to one son who would soon be coming home. 

       Near the end of the news report we find ourselves at Town Hall listening to selectmen react to the town’s first loss of a native son — the 13th Massachusetts casualty of the war we are told. One selectman who graduated high school a few years ahead of the soldier remembered him as positive and upbeat, a man fighting for what he believed was right. Another, much older in years and less certain about why the soldier had gone to war, merely stated, with the power that comes when profound truths are offered simply, “It’s a great loss. It hurts. He was one of our own.”

       The news report ends with yet one more glimpse of the soldier’s home lit up by the lights of the TV crew, the American flag still hanging next to the front door, the unseen family still grieving in silence behind the weathered shingles. They more than anyone must be searching to find meaning in the death of one so young. They better than anyone know the truth of the elder selectman’s words.

       “He was one of our own.”