IT’S RECALLING ALL THE RACES RUN
That makes me tend to frown
and often fret.
It’s recalling that my memory’s gone
Left behind in all the struggles and
The races I never ran
but still regret.
IT’S KNOWING THAT AS A YOUNG MAN I
Had muscles, wavy hair and
Unspent power that
Fueled my stride.
All receding in some cruelly ebbing tide
Leaving a shell that clings
With diminished self awareness and
Deflated pride.
IT’S NOT LIVING IN A WORLD I NEVER CHOSE
That makes me question
The young man that stands
Behind the eyes.
It’s living in a body that fails too often
And takes me out of service
With a sudden and disturbing
Sense of surprise.
It’s feeling shackled and forgotten
In a prison of my Maker’s
Cruelest device.
A prison whose walls crumble and fall
Once so proud and oh-so tall
Now projecting one’s
Inevitable demise.
IT’S THE CARESSES AND THE WHISPERS
Of lovers whose final tally
Will never change.
It’s the walls and fences
Once there to jump
That leave the fading athlete
blushingly contained.
No more Siren calls to
Draw the man
In search of treasure
Or hollow fame.
Not even when the Siren calls him out
By his once
Familiar name.
IT’S THE POWER AND THE FIRES OF MY YOUTH
Thoughtlessly squandered and
Stupidly spent,
The races I now count as lost
Beyond repair
Whose echoing absence
I sacredly repent.
Till I cannot count the years
That connive to outgrow my body,
Weaken my resolve and, yes,
Haunt my soul.
They undo my plans and cause
Me to ask with grim reality,
When did I ever get
So fucking old?