“Step right up, folks. Don’t miss your chance to help send a soon-to-be-convicted traitor to the White House for four years of unbridled chicanery and chaos.

“If you thought Trump 1 broke all the rules, violated all norms, and opened up the U.S. Treasury to widescale looting by the billionaire class, well wait till you see Trump 2.

“The beauty of this election,” New Hampshire officials say, “is the value you get for your money.  Because in New Hampshire you get multiple votes.

“Did you hear that?

“Not just one vote, but multiple votes!

“Imagine how you will dazzle your friends! Today, for one day only, you can vote for TRUMP THE TRAITOR at the same time you’re voting for TRUMP THE BUSINESS FRAUD, as well as TRUMP THE SEXUAL PREDATOR and TRUMP THE INCURABLE LIAR. And Let’s not forget TRUMP THE WORST PRESIDENT EVER . That’s at least 5 votes you get when you’re casting just one.

“Just be aware that the Republican Party no longer accepts or acknowledges all votes for their opponents, insisting they would never win another election if they accepted the will of the people.

”So remember, Today is “VOTE FOR A TRAITOR DAY” in New Hampshire. 

Or not.